On a recent visit to Journeycare, we stood outside the doorway of a patient and asked the family if he wanted to visit with Mystery, one of our miniature therapy horses.
We were told the patient really loves animals, but that they were uncertain whether he was prepared for it at this time. Encouraged to ask the patient himself, we walked into the room. The man slowly opened up his eyes.
In our fast-paced, success-based society, people often feel stigmatized for the need to seek out counseling support. There’s this expectation that people will “pull themselves up by the bootstraps,” and the desire for help is deemed a failure. Men in particular are taught early on to withhold their emotions, and those who remain stoic in the face of adversity are considered heroic. Although we each carry a unique perspective, there are certain universal experiences that alter the course of our lives and inevitably affect our way of thinking.
I read. And I write, but not nearly as much as I read. And sometimes I read books about dying. I recently read "When Breath Becomes Air" by Paul Kalanithi, which has been on The New York Times best seller list for several weeks. It is written by a neurosurgeon regarding his diagnosis with terminal lung cancer.
I flagged several lines in the book because they resonated with me.
The first part of the book is a reflection on his life in the medical field.
· On page 80: “Learning to judge whose life could be saved, whose couldn’t be, and whose shouldn't be requires an unattainable prognostic ability.”
· On page 102: “How little do doctors understand the hells through which we put patients.”
Advance care planning is something I'm passionate about. As an Advanced Care Planning Advocate for JourneyCare, I am very lucky that my job allows me to do something I believe in so strongly.
An important part of my work is to bring focus to National Healthcare Decisions Day, which is approaching on April 16. This nationwide initiative exists to inspire, educate and empower you, as well as your healthcare providers, about the importance of advance care planning.
This year’s theme is “It Always Seems Too Early, Until It’s Too Late.” I have witnessed the truth of this slogan firsthand.